The NFC B-Day Chat Thread

[Teila]

Thank you Teila, that's a very good point and I hadn't thought of that

Also I am having a hard time respecting them when they act like literal children like now... drunk and throwing a fit. :/

Guess I'll just leave for a while and come back later

I hear ya! I too do not tolerant drunks very well.

Time for you to find a distraction so that you are not involved. If I find myself getting annoyed at FIL because he has had too much wine, I go off somewhere and read a book or don the headphones and listen to music, watch a movie or whatever.

Your can not control their actions but your reaction is your responsibility

 

[ShrekDawg]

I hear ya! I too do not tolerant drunks very well.

Time for you to find a distraction so that you are not involved. If I find myself getting annoyed at FIL because he has had too much wine, I go off somewhere and read a book or don the headphones and listen to music, watch a move or whatever.

Your can not control their actions but your reaction is your responsibility

Yeah, I'm watching TV now after being outside all day. I went to two stores to buy the stuff, the first I waited 40 minutes for a load in before giving up and loading it myself, then went to second store and Subway (the restaurant) so I was gone all afternoon. Then they were being annoying so I drove the stuff right back and spread it right then as it was getting dark lol then showered as I was covered in dirt and sweat LOL

Anyway, I used to care a ton and cry and also used to hurt myself over it but now I don't care. Or at least that's what I tell myself. But on the bright side I'm gonna be 4 years clean in August.

I also used to blare my music and stay upstairs but since my brothers' moved out I tend to get involved and in the middle which doesn't help anything. I need to go back to ignoring it. Ha

It's been like 15 years though so I'm over it

 

[ronott1]

Yeah, I'm watching TV now after being outside all day. I went to two stores to buy the stuff, the first I waited 40 minutes for a load in before giving up and loading it myself, then went to second store and Subway (the restaurant) so I was gone all afternoon. Then they were being annoying so I drove the stuff right back and spread it right then as it was getting dark lol then showered as I was covered in dirt and sweat LOL

Anyway, I used to care a ton and cry and also used to hurt myself over it but now I don't care. Or at least that's what I tell myself. But on the bright side I'm gonna be 4 years clean in August.

I also used to blare my music and stay upstairs but since my brothers' moved out I tend to get involved and in the middle which doesn't help anything. I need to go back to ignoring it. Ha

It's been like 15 years though so I'm over it

Keep hope for them though!

 

[ShrekDawg]

Keep hope for them though!

Yeah, trying to but honestly I think they'd be better off divorced.

 

[Teila]

My parents fought constantly but stayed together for the “sake of the children”. The children would probably have had better childhoods if they had just split up!!

I am the youngest and moved out of home, on my own at 17; they split up the next day!

Sometimes parents genuinely believe they are doing the right thing and have no idea that what they believe is right is actually doing more harm than good.

Once I had secured a full time job and made a decision that I was moving, I saved every $ I could but also started a ‘moving out’ stash. If I saw stuff on special or secondhand things that I would need, I would buy them and tuck them away; meaning that when the time did come to move, I would already have a lot of the stuff I needed and therefore, less cash outlay when I did move.

Granted, I did not have much and my first place was not ‘pretty’ by a long shot, but it was peaceful

 

[ShrekDawg]

My parents fought constantly but stayed together for the “sake of the children”. The children would probably have had better childhoods if they had just split up!!

I am the youngest and moved out of home, on my own at 17; they split up the next day!

Sometimes parents genuinely believe they are doing the right thing and have no idea that what they believe is right is actually doing more harm than good.

Once I had secured a full time job and made a decision that I was moving, I saved every $ I could but also started a ‘moving out’ stash. If I saw stuff on special or secondhand things that I would need, I would buy them and tuck them away; meaning that when the time did come to move, I would already have a lot of the stuff I needed and therefore, less cash outlay when I did move.

Granted, I did not have much and my first place was not ‘pretty’ by a long shot, but it was peaceful

That's exactly how I feel! Not doing any good by staying together..

Maybe I need to start a stash haha

Peaceful sounds nice...

I actually did go to regular college for a year and one semester after high school and it was nice

 

[rjohns39]

Morning

@Teila that's great you and the almost former employer had a chance to talk. Maybe that will help make things better for your co-workers that continue to work there.

Got some bad news yesterday...a young man DH & I have grown close to is in some very serious trouble. Unfortunately, he's the maintenance crew boss and now DH is (again) short-handed and will have to take on even more day to day responsibilities. DH is already exhausted, so I'm concerned for him. Not a good situation for anyone connected. Any prayers for this young man's well-being would be appreciated.

Great Job teila...

KD.... Been sitting here for a while trying to figure out advice for you... I wish I had a dollar for every dumb decision I made at your age, I'd be rich... But then, that's half the fun. I guess my first suggestion would be to not try and judge or analyze your parent's relationship. It simply isn't a 3rd party sport. Second, save all you can. If you don't really need, and I mean NEED it, don't buy it. Avoid debt at all costs... Yes you need to establish a credit history, but be very frugal and careful. Borrow, pay and be done. Never take on debt that needs to be repaid monthly... Plan on having at least six times what you think you need for your first place. And in the end just don't be in a hurry.... Time fixes all....

 

[Teila]

That's exactly how I feel! Not doing any good by staying together..

Maybe I need to start a stash haha

Peaceful sounds nice...

I actually did go to regular college for a year and one semester after high school and it was nice

Sorry, I am not sure if you have mentioned what your career goal is so this may be way off track but here in Aus we have Jackaroo's and Jillaroo's who get somewhere to sleep, food and payment for living on the farms, working with the livestock etc; something I believe would be right up your alley? Is ranch hand the correct term for the States?

Have you considered one of the defence forces? Yeah, I get that they are dangerous, but they are also a good opportunity to 'establish' yourself and achieve your goals while also providing further education, somewhere to sleep, food while still being paid.

Here, we also have fly in / fly out mining jobs; where you work 3 weeks or something 'on site' and then get flown back home for 2 or so weeks off. Again, board and food including in package.

If you want to make a change, there are a few opportunities available that provide your accommodation while still also paying you.

Others may also have suggestions?

 

[ShrekDawg]

Great Job teila...

KD.... Been sitting here for a while trying to figure out advice for you... I wish I had a dollar for every dumb decision I made at your age, I'd be rich... But then, that's half the fun. I guess my first suggestion would be to not try and judge or analyze your parent's relationship. It simply isn't a 3rd party sport. Second, save all you can. If you don't really need, and I mean NEED it, don't buy it. Avoid debt at all costs... Yes you need to establish a credit history, but be very frugal and careful. Borrow, pay and be done. Never take on debt that needs to be repaid monthly... Plan on having at least six times what you think you need for your first place. And in the end just don't be in a hurry.... Time fixes all....

Thanks! This is really good advice.

I apparently have a good credit history already but I don't pay my card off yet

I think the first step needs to be to not buy so much band merch which is hard because some of them are my friends but I'd rather move out than have more stuff.

Sorry, I am not sure if you have mentioned what your career goal is so this may be way off track but here in Aus we have Jackaroo's and Jillaroo's who get somewhere to sleep, food and payment for living on the farms, working with the livestock etc; something I believe would be right up your alley? Is ranch hand the correct term for the States?

Have you considered one of the defence forces? Yeah, I get that they are dangerous, but they are also a good opportunity to 'establish' yourself and achieve your goals while also providing further education, somewhere to sleep, food while still being paid.

Here, we also have fly in / fly out mining jobs; where you work 3 weeks or something 'on site' and then get flown back home for 2 or so weeks off. Again, board and food including in package.

If you want to make a change, there are a few opportunities available that provide your accommodation while still also paying you.

Others may also have suggestions?

Thanks, those are good ideas but I'm not sure right for me, except maybe the farm thing. Don't really wanna join the army or something.

And my major is Behavioral Science which I think is a branch of psychology but idk.

I might just get a retail job to save up the money. Or I might get licensed and insured and start a legitimate dog walking business.

 

[CapricornFarm]

Thanks! This is really good advice.

I apparently have a good credit history already but I don't pay my card off yet

I think the first step needs to be to not buy so much band merch which is hard because some of them are my friends but I'd rather move out than have more stuff.



Thanks, those are good ideas but I'm not sure right for me, except maybe the farm thing. Don't really wanna join the army or something.

And my major is Behavioral Science which I think is a branch of psychology but idk.

I might just get a retail job to save up the money. Or I might get licensed and insured and start a legitimate dog walking business.

You might do better to learn a skill like dog grooming, get more money for your time. I used to do up to 13 grooms a day ( a long day, with a dog bather helping me) But pretty good bucks.